I feel like a part of me just left.
11:58 AM
Even at the end of forever..
7:42 PM
"I ain't gonna sit here, and just wait for you." We would never be the same, no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I cry. I don't think that in my life I've ever made this worst mistake. I was happy while it lasted, I should've lived it to the fullest. Abuse it, overuse it. Feel everything. I'm tired of people asking, "How are you doing?", day by day, I get it. I'm tired of people telling me I'm stupid for wasting it, walking out the door. What used to be can never be back. Past is past. I have no regrets in doing what I did, or saying what I said. I listened and enough is enough. Life is so honest to me, that I have to pay more attention to change. Everytime you look at the mirror, you see the emotion behind your face.. Till you're staring at your mistakes hiding behind your face upon your everyday. Staying real true, everyday. There's no use in trying when the pieces just don't fit anymore. Trying to solve a puzzle when one of the pieces have been thrown in the trash. Trying to submit an essay and get an A, when one of the pages are missing, left on the desk, sitting alone. Impossible. What's trying for? What's thinking about what should've been, could've been, or would've been, if it's over. It's hard to say goodbye, but it's even harder to walk away. When I gave my best, and it's all over. Fuck all the memories. Fuck the lunch times. Fuck the phone calls. Fuck the text messages. Fuck chatting late at night. Fuck all the pictures. Fuck everything that had to do between the both of us. You were once something, and now you're nothing, but a piece of garbage that I would never recycle. I'm sorry, I'm still searching for the true one. I'm still like a kid, playing around.. Just like in kindergarten, you're just friends with everyone.. You do things that humiliate you. You do things that you don't normally do.. But I'm growing up inch by inch. Sorry if I acted strange. It's because of you being so out of range. Ahaa. With good things, came bad ones. With every breath I take, Imma be more careful. With every step I make, Imma suspect. Should I leave it all like this.. Hah ! Even when I take a step, further than this, I'd still be hurt. What can I do. Nothing, but accept the words' been thrown to me. There's no holding back in reality. There's no forever. Promise is just a word, never yet to be proven. Well, by the fact that you never did. This was like a movie, cause it kept replaying in my head. Rewind, puuush. Forward, baaam. Play, boooo. Except for stop, it was never an option. Change will never hurt you. Just open up your heart, and look for the real one. Once you do that, you're life will then begin.. Don't let hatred and anger fill your heart. It's too late for us. Forget about me.
Yayyyy. I finally get to write about pizza again. Pizza, Hahaaa((= Cause it's like a combination of things. Not just what happened lately, but way back in the past. So, I'M NOT TRYING TO HIT JUST ONE PERSON WITH THIS BLOG. Kayyssss? Cause I wanna slap this blog to.. MANY PEOPLE. jk(: Hahaaaa. But seriously, imagine what Hannah has been through during her past 14 yeaaars. And now, it's gonna be 15. Aww. Old. I'm counting weeks. :D ahaaaa. But nopeeee. I needa stop trippin' tho.. Imma tie my shoelaces now. PLEASE don't get offended by this. If you think it's for you, then good for youuuu. BS maaaan. haaahaa(= No drama, please. Don't you feel sorry for me. I had too much of them, just give me some waterrrr. x)Labels: Forget about me, Let's forget, My mistake
But I keep climbing and hoping things would change, and the sky turns gray, and the water from the rain washes progress away
12:18 PM
"But I keep climbing and hoping things would change, and the sky turns gray, and the water from the rain washes progress away." I lost my way, you said you'd stay. Like a born selfish baby, you left me helpless. But now I won't see you, and you won't see me. It's over & I'm sober. It will never get right, it's time to move on & get you out of my sight. It used to be worth the weight of gold, now the stocks are out & down. A storm came by, and hit us. Turned us down, drowned by rivers of lies. Oceans of tears were cried & dried. Sorries wouldn't do it. It's been long, and it's fucked up how it ended this way. This was way less than what I deserve. You totally dissed me, and you're the one who's pissed. You said you're full of it, arguments & bullshit. You let the bad take away all the good. Your words, explanations sounded so wrong like a piano out of tune. It could've worked, but you didn't find the need to. You pushed me away, as if you were moving mountains. You played smart, like a college professor. My heart was obliterated, and no one can travel through. It will never be the same. Just like an island, in the middle of the sea. I'm like standing in the gas, and you were the flame. You didn't even have the nerve to say you're sorry. You won all the rounds in every fight. It was your way, I decided not to get in your way. But I did, I thought of myself for once, and I did. It broke everything. I realized I've been living a lie, and nothing was ever true. You looked at us, but you only see YOU. You looked at only one, never would have you seen two. We don't need to talk anymore, I have nothing left to say. You got what you want. We went our separate ways, you left me with nothing, but ALL the pain. It must be a slow death I traveled on. It felt so wrong, I barely held on. I'm up on the regrets I saved for you, I'm down on love. No matter what it takes, I gotta get everything fit together again. Let's forget. It's like moving mountains.Labels: Let's forget, Moving Mountains, Selfish